Tuesday 10 November 2015

Dot dot dot

......
Today has probably been one of the worst I've had in a long time and that hasn't been caused by someone i liked. Ever wish you could just switch off your RL sometimes and just run away? Irresponsible i know but surely everyone's felt like that every once in a while? No? Maybe.

I did spend a little bit of time online today, made a new pic, nothing fancy but i like how it turned out. Think its the hair colour that does it for me. May have to go get me some purple. I miss having my hair coloured :( I miss having long hair too. Anyway, i decided to take my ass to bed and hide from the world for a bit. Don't feel like dealing with most others in SL right now. And definitely can not be arsed to deal with people that seem to think its ok to ignore me until they need a bit of support or reassurance or a bit of company ect ect ect. I'm not a rent-a-friend. if i can be decent enough to acknowledge you when you need it have the same courtesy or get the fuck out of my life. I'm done with every kind of relationship being a one way street.
4 people, i can safely say i don't get that with. 4!?! That's like more than double the amount i could say not so long ago lol. I think I'm secretly fussy about who i open up to. But yea, 4 people that are always treating me like an equal. Its such a change from the usual crap! Seriously lol.

I know that by the time it gets late for me, i'll be feeling so much better. Late night chats and massive debates about the WWE always make me smile. Even if staying up til gone 4am to watch with a real close friend almost kills me. Things you do for some people huh lol. Still, i know he stays up late to talk to me too. Exactly what i mean by it not being a one way street.
Not really sure what the purpose of this post is to be honest, just felt like writing it. Have so much going round in my head I'm just going to get caught up in it if i stay thinking it over. So here i am.

Hate being a girl - sorry, correction - woman! apparently i should stop referring to myself as a girl lol its a habit. A hard 1 to kick. Anyway, i hate it sometimes, feel like a complete train wreck and then in a split second something will pop into my head and I'm smiling. Emotions are little fuckers. When you think you have them in check they splinter off into , um, i don't know but they don't stay in check!
I'm glad i don't have to put up with a woman. We can be so difficult at times. Of course we're worth it but yea, its hard work.

And on that note, I'm going to hunt down some ice cream, grab some tissues and give my pillow some head (whoever thought that up your a genius) might take out some frustration on some games. I don't know yet. Might log back in. Might even drown in a pool of tears and melted ice cream. Could always watch Pitch Perfect 2 again...that'd make me laugh........

oh and this is the colour i want to do my hair!



                                                   

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